The Birds

Standard

THE BIRDS ARE COMMITTING SUICIDE.

THE BIRDS ARE COMMITTING SUICIDE.

THE BIRDS ARE SUFFERING FROM A VERY VIOLENT DEPRESSION.

When I spoke¬†with their shrink therapist he said that I was a skitzo, that birds didn’t have feelings, that birds are unable to talk and therefore are unable to receive counseling from him.

Highly insensitive I think we’ve figured out why the birds are committing suicide. If there own shrink therapist won’t even listen to them and take them seriously, then how are they going to get help.

Birds are majestic creatures, beautiful in every way, and if one tells you he is contemplating suicide, you better take him seriously, Dr. Seulman.

DEPRESSION IS NOT TO BE TAKEN LIGHTLY, DR. SEULMAN.

I’m sorry, I just get so worked up over those birds. Suicide is a monstrous disease and if not taken seriously will spread vastly through the bird community. THIS MOSTER NEEDS TO BE STOPPED.

Okay, moving on then.

Today’s Quote of the Day is:

“Everything is dead. Everything is dead. Oh my God, everything is dead.” – Charlie Bradberry

I hate that Charlie. He’s such a mood killer. I was having a pretty good day too. Ya know, aside from all the bird suicides.

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